Sten Do Ideas

What is a sten do?

A sten do is a combined stag and hen party, a joint pre-wedding celebration for both the bride and groom along with their closest friends.

It’s the perfect way to celebrate if you have a close-knit group of friends which both the bride-to-be and groom are close to. Perhaps they have a group from school/uni or have a group with other couples. Why separate into smaller groups when you could combine the event and all be together on the ultimate sten do?!

Some couples are still celebrating separately, but using the sten-do term as they have a mixed group and do not feel the need to separate in the traditional way through gender.

“Sten” is also a gender-neutral term that merges “stag” and “hen,” reflecting the inclusive nature of this celebration, the term can also be used for gay and lesbian stag/hen parties.

Why book a sten party?

There are many reasons why couples might opt for a sten do instead of separate stag and hen dos. Here are a few:

Cost-effective: Combining celebrations can be more economical than planning two separate events.

More inclusive: Sten dos allow the bride and groom to celebrate with their entire friendship group, regardless of gender. This can be particularly appealing for couples with mixed friend groups or those who don’t want to feel excluded from their partner’s pre-wedding festivities.

Reduced stress: Planning one event is less stressful than planning two.

Shared memories: A sten do creates a unique opportunity for the bride, groom, and their friends to create lasting memories together before the big day. They’re starting a life together, why not kick-start that with an unforgettable adventure with all their best friends together?

What’s the difference between a sten do, hag do or fox party?

Traditionally, pre-wedding celebrations have been divided by gender – stag dos for grooms and hen dos for brides. However, these terms can often be tied to outdated stereotypes about what these celebrations should entail.

Sten do seems to be the most popular phrase, it can be for celebrations that have merged both the stag and hen parties or it can be used for inclusivity reasons.

A Hag do is similar to the sten do, it’s simply another variation and does not have any real differentiation although sometimes can be used more so if the event was planned by women.

A fox party is a gender-neutral term for a stag or hen party. They tend to be more inclusive within the LGBTQ+ community however it’s not abnormal to be used similarly to a sten or hag.

The rise of the sten do: Are they becoming more popular?

Sten dos, the all-inclusive pre-wedding celebrations for both partners and their friends, are quickly becoming the trend du jour. This shift reflects a desire for a more modern and inclusive approach to celebrating upcoming nuptials. The Sten do has gained more traction with celebrity couples jumping on the trend along with the recent storyline on Eastenders on BBC1. We’ve listed some notable occasions below, so you can steal some sten do ideas for your own.

Eastenders: The showrunners have given us a glimpse into what Whitney & Zach’s joint sten do will entail. Going against tradition, Whitney proposed to Jack in an earlier episode and the couple are clearly continuing to shake things up with a joint sten-party. The big event will of course begin at The Vic where the residents will be come dressed following the theme: famous couples – which is ranked as one of the top stag & hen themes in 2024. Although how great is Eve’s costume?! See more reactions on X.

Paris Hilton: Paris and her now-husband Carter celebrated their joint sten party in Las Vegas back in 2021, details are scarce, but reports mention her sporting big Hollywood curls and a ponytail while out clubbing with friends. The couple naturally stayed in the Hilton.

Vicky Pattison: More recently, Vicky and her partner Ercan celebrated their lavish sten do in Dubai. The couple hired a private yacht and had a pool party at the recently opened Pacha.

Kourtney Kardashian: Back in 2022 the reality TV star celebrated with her joint stag and hen do with a Romeo & Juliette theme to match their Italian wedding.

Top 21 sten do ideas

1. It’s a knockout – Inflatable obstacle courses, giant foam rollers, and hilarious wipeouts – It’s a Knockout is a hilarious activity that’s fun and competitive.
2. Escape room – Work together as a team to solve puzzles, crack codes, and escape a themed room within a time limit.
3. Bottomless brunch – Fuel your day with delicious food and bottomless drinks at a sten do brunch. This is a great option for a relaxed and social celebration.
4. Cabaret – Enjoy a night of live music, singing and dancing, the perfect way to start the big night out.
5. Go to a festival – Line up the sten do weekend over a festival, create lasting memories and party to your favourite artists.
6. Drag brunch – Experience the outrageous and entertaining world of drag queens over brunch.
7. Old School sports day – Relive your childhood memories with a fun-filled old school sports day. Organise sack races and other classic games for some competitive fun.
8. White water rafting – Embark on an adrenaline-pumping adventure with white water rafting. This is a great activity for thrill-seekers who want to experience the power of nature.
9. Hire a large house – Rent a large house for your sten do and enjoy the privacy and freedom of your own space. This is a great option for groups who want to relax, have fun, and create lasting memories together.
10. Interactive games bar – Want something fun to do to kick-start your weekend? Shoot some darts, play crazy golf or throw some axes at a city centre bar.
11. Country Pursuits – Try your hand at clay pigeon shooting, archery, or get down and dirty on a mud buggy or quad bike.
12. Paddleboarding – This is a relaxing activity that’s perfect for a scenic sten do. Learn how to balance, do some yoga or play silly games.
13. Sailing – If you have more budget to play with, why not hire a boat with your besties? Sit back and relax or gain some speed and learn the ropes. This adventure can be what you make of it.
14. Go for a hike – A great way to bond with friends, lace up your boots and hike around the mountains, countryside or even to the local pub for a Sunday roast. If you’re heading somewhere new, we recommend using All Trails to discover the best routes.
15. Life drawing – A fun and creative activity that’s sure to get everyone laughing. Life drawing can have men or women posing or even stitch up the bride/groom!
16. Wine tasting – If the happy couple are fans of the drink, an arranged tasting could be the perfect way to spend the afternoon. Either go to a vineyard, a bar or arrange for a connoisseur to come to you.
17. Casino nights – Head into town and test your luck on the tables or arrange a poker night at home.
18. Host a dinner party – Get together for a delicious homemade meal. Everyone can bring a dish or you could even hire a private chef to cater for your group. Why not hire a hunky butler to serve.
19. Karaoke – Belt out your favorite tunes and unleash your inner rockstar at a karaoke bar.
20. Go to a comedy club – Laugh the night away at a stand-up show, combined with a meal and a few drinks it could be the ideal way to start the night and the happy couple are sure to be a target!
21. Spa day – if you are looking for a relaxing sten do idea then why not head to the spa and relax around the pool. Alternatively, you can hire mobile pamperers to come to you to perform treatments from your own home!

How to plan a sten do: advice from the experts

Our event planners know all the best sten do ideas. Whether you’re the maid of honor/best man or part of the planning crew, here’s your guide to throwing a sten do that’s unforgettable for everyone involved.

Step 1: Decide who is coming on the sten party

Your guest list is going to make or break this event. Although you may want to keep the sten do a surprise, we always recommend asking them for a list beforehand and then it’s your job to send out the invites. At the very least confirm whether they want parents, family, colleagues and that they’re happy mixing their friendship groups. The last thing you’ll want to do is to make anyone feel uncomfortable. Once that’s all decided, it’s time to create a formidable group chat!

See more: Who to invite to the hen party

Step 2: Agree on a budget

Discuss everyone’s expectations and establish a realistic budget. Transparency is key – knowing how much everyone is comfortable spending will help you choose the right location, activities and accommodation. Consider setting up a shared spreadsheet or online budgeting tool to keep everyone informed.

Step 3: Pick your dates

Once you have agreed on the budget, you need to decide the dates. The best approach is to backtrack from the wedding date, according to our reports groups tend to book their stag and hens roughly 4-6 weeks prior to the wedding day. This is to give the couple enough time to finalise the wedding planning and it’s also enough time for any scratches/bruises to wear off! It’s also worth thinking about who is coming, do you have any teachers who aren’t able to book off term time for example?

Are there any festivals or gigs that the couple may want to attend? Could you plan the sten do around this?

Step 4: Choose a location for your sten do

Now you know your dates and budget, choosing a location will be much easier. If you’re going abroad, look at weather estimates. If you are planning a UK sten do, look at transport options and agree how far you are all willing to travel.

Step 5: Book your accommodation (and flights if applicable)

The next step is to look into group accommodation. With your budget in mind, decide if you want a a budget hotel, luxury accommodation or if you all want to be together in a large house. The key factors to keep in mind is location, amenities and bedrooms. Are your group happy sharing a bedroom? Do you have anyone that requires accessibility? If you are planning on going abroad, we recommend booking flights as early as possible to secure the best rates.

Step 6: Choose your activities

Remember, the main focus of a sten do is to celebrate the couple. Plan activities they would enjoy and personalize experiences to reflect their relationship. Is there anything they’ve always wanted to do? Are they adrenaline junkies or after a chilled-out weekend? Is there anything unique to your chosen destination?

Pro Tip: Don’t overload the schedule. Leave room for free time and relaxation.

Step 7:  Plan transportation

If your sten do involves travel, figure out transportation beforehand. Will everyone be driving themselves, or will you need to arrange group transportation like a carpool or a shuttle service?

Step 8: Plan your meals

Once you’ve got the bulk of the sten do planned, it’s time to start thinking about food. If you are travelling as part of a large group, you’ll have to book restaurants at least a couple of weeks before. Is there anything that the couple LOVE, a curry or steakhouse perhaps? You can always put out a poll to the group chat to help you decide.

If you have a house, research local takeaways or hire a private chef for the evening.

Step 9: Order the final bits

A couple of weeks before the sten do, start thinking about the nitty-gritty details. Are you planning on having a fancy dress night or running a theme throughout the trip? Have you ordered any games or funny props that you can use during any activities? Have you ordered matching swim wear or sunglasses?

Do you need to send out a packing list to the group or the happy couple? Try to include things that may throw them off the scent.